Like, when you’re zoned out watching TV at way past your bedtime.

And you’re dozing wide awake.

With Talking Heads’ “Psycho Killer” running through your brain.

And suddenly there’s a black screen in front of you.

With just a microphone stand illuminated by a spotlight.

And Fred Armisen walks up to it.

Dressed in a gray suit and white shoes, and with his hair all slicked back.

And he taps the mic, deadpans the camera, and quietly says, “It’s actually pronounced Port-LAN-ja.”

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Published by

Jesse Gordon

Geek. Writer. Supreme overlord of the SUPERMEGANET pseudoverse. Author of THE OATMEAL MAN, DOOKIE, and other such wasteful nonsense.