“It’s the early nineties or something. You can tell because I’m wearing a neon-pink tank top, bike shorts, and sneakers. And I’ve got an epic flat-top. I’m in my parents’ house. Instead of my mom’s yoga studio, the living room is an actual living room, with a couch, coffee table, and everything. I’m kneeling in front of the VCR, and am hastily fast-forwarding through a stack of videotapes. David Arkenstone, David Lanz, Mars Lasar, Patrick O’Hearn, John Tesh, and Yanni have formed the ultimate New Age supergroup, and are doing a live concert on PBS that’s coming on in five minutes, and I’ve just got to record it, or else the known world will come to an end. But all I can find are tapes with half an hour here, ten minutes there between episodes of Mr. Belvedere and Star Trek: The Next Generation—you know, important stuff I’m not about to erase—nothing, though, with enough space for a full ninety-minute concert.
“The best I can come up with is half an hour at the end of a TDK T-120 tape crammed with a handful of really good The Simpsons episodes. Here’s the thing: that’s in SP mode. I could use SLP mode to get a full ninety minutes of recording time, but the sound and video quality would be terrible. So, I’m stuck with, like, a minute to go before the concert starts, and I have to decide if I’m going to record the full show using crap SLP, or the first half-hour in high quality using SP.
“What does the dream mean?”
Dr. Chandelier shifts loudly in his leather armchair, thinks for a sec. “Ever hear of a wet dream, my boy?”
I blush. “Yeah.”
“This would be the exact opposite of that.”
Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this episode, help support SuperMegaNet by buying one of my books or using one of the share buttons below.